moon & sun & whisky

All over the media, I keep hearing that Thursday was the “six-year anniversary of the Iraq war.”

It wasn’t.

Yes, it is certainly true that the sun has gone around the earth six times since we invaded. (Or is it the other way around? Note to self — ask that flat-earth lady from The View.)

But it can’t be the “six year anniversary” because THERE IS NO SUCH THING. Because the word anniversary means the yearly recurrence of an event, or the celebration of that recurrence. You know, because the root of the word comes from the Latin for year.

Granted, we’ve been hearing for a decade or two of stupid and hopeful dating couples who would celebrate their “two and a half week anniversary” because this was the longest that any of their relationships had ever lasted. But some reason, it seems that America has collectively decided to follow the lead of those by-now long broken up lovers.

So now we never hear about the first anniversary or the sixth anniversary — it’s the “one-year anniversary” or the “six-year anniversary.”

It’s not like we don’t have other words for celebration or commemoration. Just off the top of my head there’s celebration and commemoration. We only have one word for the yearly remembrance of an event. Or at least we did. Now we don’t have any.